Emotional Exhaustion and the Media (How to Reduce Stress)

When people look for information on how to reduce stress, they’re usually the type of people who have a lot on their plate. Many fall into this category, but there’s also another group of us: We objectively don’t do too much and wonder why we’re still experiencing symptoms of stress.

We’re all familiar with the dangers of modern media, especially (though not only) social media. We know it’s designed – by an army of highly paid experts – to capture and keep our attention, and that this has led to the so-called “attention crisis”.

What we’re less aware of is another problem connected with modern media. This is what directly connects back to stress. It’s the reason why even those of us who have slowed down and don’t overdo it in terms of work and daily chores, can find ourselves tired, with low energy and/or zero motivation to even do something we love.

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The symptoms you don’t know about

Everyone knows that stress can lead to tension, a short temper, to anxiety and an inability to settle down. But as pages like this one show, it can also manifest in depression or a loss of interest in life. It can make you feel lonely or make mental health problems worse. And when you scroll down to the possible physical issues that can result from stress, the list is staggeringly long.

A little recap from the excellent book Burnout by A. and E. Nagoski: Stress happens when our body’s stress response is triggered (which among other things, leads to the production of adrenalin) and instead of the adrenalin being used up by us running away or fighting or whatever we were required to do in ancient times in order to get to safety, the adrenalin remains in the body. That’s because these days, stress is mostly mental and very rarely represents an actual, acute danger we need to fight with physical exertion.

When all that adrenaline has nowhere to go, it can really mess with our bodies and minds. This is a super simplified explanation, of course, but it’s handy to keep it in mind for the rest of this article.

Woman leaning her head against the handrail of a balcony, apparently exhausted

The hidden dangers of media use

Like I said above, most people are now aware of the attention crisis and the way modern media are designed to draw us in and keep us going. Fewer know about the emotional toll media use takes. If someone looks into how to reduce stress, they’re unlikely to think of their media use.

The thing is: Algorithms exist to keep us reading and scrolling. The longer we stay on a news or media site, the longer the TV remains on, the more advertising we see; it’s as simple as that. Since humans are motivated by emotions, the algorithm will show us increasingly outrageous – either good or bad – news and posts, so we’ll react by getting angry, laughing out loud, being sad etc. The stronger the emotional response, the more likely it is that it’ll keep us glued to the screen.

The result of this is that we’re constantly experiencing intense emotions, a stream of sadness, empathy, outrage, disbelief… It’s like an incessant bombardment we’re woefully unprepared for. Historically, people had little reason or means to elicit such a quick succession of different emotions. It’s specifically our access to media and through them, so many events and different people, that has changed this.

Exposed to this constant stream of emotional triggers, we end up fatigued and numb. We experience not just mental, but also emotional exhaustion and that’s a type of stress most people aren’t even aware of.

Detecting emotional exhaustion

If you’re wondering how to spot the signs, I recommend not only looking at how much you’re doing, but also at the emotions you’re exposed to day by day. If you consume media, you need to look closely. By media, I mean:

  • newspapers

  • TV

  • radio

  • social media

This doesn’t mean the media are bad per se, but it does mean that you should dosage your use of them carefully. The effects are not something you can avoid through your intelligence or awareness. The companies who devise the algorithms, who create TV and radio programs, know what they’re doing. No matter how smart you are or how strong your willpower, they’ll still hijack your brain and your feelings.

If you’ve been feeling any of the symptoms mentioned above, it could be a sign. Disinterest in life, a reduced motivation to go out and meet people, “laziness” (quotes because you’re not actually lazy, you’re simply experiencing a symptom), lack of motivation to do even things you love doing, are all red flags.

How to reduce stress and emotional exhaustion

So how can you reduce the stress that results from the media? The obvious answer seems to be: Don’t use media. But it’s not as simple as that.

Apart from the fact that we like to be informed and stay in touch with friends and acquaintances, it can be a challenge to even avoid media. There are infoscreens everywhere, offices have the radio going in the background and every bar seems to have a TV screen.

Here are some ideas on how to reduce stress from media:

  • Having completely media- and screen-free days is definitely a good idea. Try one screen-free weekend per month or one day per week. Do a one-week screen detox, like I did last summer.

  • Declare a cut-off time in the evening after which you’ll no longer consume media. It should be at least one hour before your bedtime, ideally sooner.

  • Limit your social media use to one or two platforms. I’ve given up everything except Facebook, Instagram and for my business, LinkedIn.

  • Pick your favourite news outlet and watch or read them once a day. After that, turn off the news and don’t consume any more that day.

The most important part is not to feel bad if you don’t manage this perfectly. Again, the media are designed to outsmart all your resistances. Be kind to yourself and keep trying and adjusting, until you find the approach that works for you. And once you do, you can use your newfound energy to do more of what you love.

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